Not good enough

As a player it can be intimidating, there are so many levels of great players and as an instructor I get intimidated by how fast some players improve in comparison with my own progress forward towards improvement.

It truly is humbling, but at the same time its a source of inspiration that drives me to keep putting in the work, the competition is high and it continuously gets better.

I ask myself why do I not give up or how can I still believe I belong. In a world of players that destroy me at the table how can I continue to call myself a player?

I feel this way as an instructor too.

My answer is this.

Pool gives my life meaning, I walk into Walmart im nobody, I walk into the truck stop im invisible, but when I walk into a pool hall im a bad mother fucker.

I dont just feel like a pool player when im at a pool hall I feel this way when im stuck in my truck a million miles away from a table.

I might get destroyed, but I still feel like I can hold my own with anyone anytime.

I feel like im a better instructor than I am a pool player, im torn between my thoughts that you don't have to be a player to be an instructor and my thoughts that because im a player i am a better instructor.

Very humbling, but my confidence stems from playing pool and playing the role of instructor and this radiates throughout my life.

Just thinking out loud